....ehhh

So for the past few days I've been going through a few strange emotions and I'm just trying to deal as best I know how and that's to pray and be super positive about it!! Right now I'm beginning to think that it's coming around to me and I don't want it to but my relationship with this person is starting to get to me because I think the way I feel it different from what they feel and I really with it wasn't this way, I hope this is just a phase and it doesn't continue to be this way cuz I don't have to live like this and you can be miserable somewhere else. I pray to the Lord things get better and if its in His will I know it will be done. I know that this past year a lot of things have changed and ppl left outta my life but in no way did I want ppl to think that I chose this over them, my door and my phone is always open to you and that's all I can say. One thing I try to do is figure out why things happen just because and I know everything happens for a reason and maybe this is going on to show that I shouldn't have turned family away and this is what happens when u turn certain ppl away that care for someone you just met I can blow up in your face down the line I mean this person has no reason to stay and once they are gone boom you are left with no one BUT guess what I refuse to think this way because one person may feel this way the one person I thought would be there but I didn't and I know I may not be making any sense but I just need to get this out because I have no one to talk to. Man I wish I did because I have sooo much to say but I don't feel like airing it out on my blog. Anyway I hope things get better and I get stronger each and everyday because I have so much to be grateful for and I don't wanna take anything for granted. =D